Tuesday, August 16, 2011

I'm Sorry

I feel sooooo bad because this blog is my baby, I have been neglecting her for months.  I am a bad parent.  Because I have been going through my own personal issues, I have failed to even jot down a note in reference to the thing I love and love to do.  But I believe that it is useless and undermining to write only out of pain.  I like talk about the issue and provide the solution (or at least the way I resolved the matter). 

***Disclaimer Any advice or suggestions you receive here are my opinions.  I am not your therapist. Cuz I am crazy too.  Smile.

The reason that I have been away so long is because I have been in my own emotional/personal trial.  And I didn't even have words to express everything I was thinking, feeling, and going through.  I had so many issues and things that I haven't dealt with but pushed down so hard that when they came up, boy was it a sight to see.  It is never good to repress stuff, because it does come back and you have to deal with it. It could be days, weeks, months, years but sister it is coming back.  Now you can keep pushing it down, but eventually it reflects in your personality, your conversations, your actions and your love for others.  What is it that people say, "Your actions speak louder than your words."?  That is what happens when bitterness sets in. 

Recently, I had an opportunity to talk about the effects of bitterness.  I believe that so many of us, have that root as the Bible calls, it but we mask and nuture it and it continues to grow.  Then when it is out of control, we simply say, I don't know where that came from.  Ahhhh, yes you do.

The reason why I chose bitterness is because I have been truly effected by it.  Until I studied what it was, I had no clue.  Bitterness starts with hurt, then turns to anger, then resentment, then it's on and popping.  I told the class that I have a process when things hurt me.  It starts with the hurt, turns into an essay, then it is a 12 page paper, I make it a novel, then it's a 30-second commmerical, to trailer, to movie.  Halle Berry plays me. 

For the rest of this year, I have declared that I will use my power of forgiveness and use it for good.  I have also decided that I can veto any thought, word, or decision that negatively affects my well being.  Oh yeah, I am trademarking the phrase, "What if I don't Want TO?" 

I like that phrase because it stumps people.  If you are real honest and say you don't want to, what can a person do but accept your honesty.  Period. 

So back to my neglectful parenting.  My baby almost starved.  I have gotten emails, questions and some really bad looks because I haven't written a word in months.  Sorry!  I am making a dedicated commitment to give you something each month.  Something good and Godly.  Something that makes you laugh.  Something you can use. 

I will also be working on a few projects as well during this time and I promise to keep you in the loop.  I am so excited to be connected to women who encourage me and who are truly seeking my good.  Recently I have met two women, who I am sure will have a positive impact on MiVida (my life).  I look forward to learning and gleaning valuable tools from you both. 

Thanks for bearing with me during this time and I promise to give you something every month to encourage you to KEEP Walking in Faith!!!!

Love Ya All,